The Apprentice 2012 Episode 2: I was nodding off like Maria

Junior Apprentice runner-up James McCullagh exclusively has his say on Episode 2 of Apprentice 2012. Read why he reckons he'd rather swim in a bath of La Popcorn than buy the girls' bullet-proof shield and why he was nodding off just like Maria...


This week on The Apprentice (cool narrator voice).

The guys came up with a decent product, it just looked to me like a cafetiere for out of date food scraps but apparently everyone who lives in a flat needs this to deal with their food waste. (SUREEEE)

But what really annoyed me was the girls' product. They made a bullet proof shield that you could put in the bath, or on the bath, or hold it beside the bath, to stop your baby from splashing water or something (I still don't quite know what it was). And to top it all off it comes with crayons so your child can vandalise it. Great. That's all this country needs, more chavs spray-painting the streets.

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I mean without a doubt, I think that is one of the worst products I've ever seen. Now I know I made feta cheese popcorn and called it La Popcorn, but I would swim in a pool of La Popcorn for three weeks before I would buy the girls' bullet proof shield. What were they thinking? The London riots are over girls. The focus group hated it, but because Laura and Jane had kids they were qualified to say no, screw focus groups, we need a bullet proof shield! Mothers everywhere will thank us for it some day. So they made it, and to this day, mothers all around the world pay tribute to them for a product that changed their lives forever…

Because they had a bad product, the pitch needed to be perfect. And I mean super-perfect. It wasn't. They asked for an order of one million units. This was getting crazy. Did I hear them right? One million? Why not a trillion or even a gazillion?

When they went back to the boardroom, Lord Sugar wasn't having any of this bullet proof shield malarkey and neither were the retailers, they only got 7,500 orders. * Cough * La Popcorn got over 100,000 * Cough *

Nick and Karen did their usual reading out the figures like it's the X-Factor results routine (Which I love).

The girls lost again, and even their very own bullet proof shield wasn't enough to save Maria from getting the finger of doom pointed at her. She was fired. And I'm not sure if I completely agree with that decision. At least she had a point of view. She was a bit exciting. Jenna and Katie really haven't impressed me and they can count themselves a bit lucky.

Really there are only two girls in with any sort of a chance of winning The Apprentice. Gabrielle - the quirky project manager from week 1. And Jade - who seems to have that Apprentice steel that others are lacking. The rest of the girls will be dispersed off in a food compacter… but where would we find one of those?

Next week I want some more creativity. Something more innovative, this week I found myself a little like Maria and nodding off.

But my 3 tips to win are still there. Gabrielle, Jane (by the skin of her teeth), and Ricky.

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